Back to the First

my last post was emo too..i just realised, how dumb of me...
exams have passed..got back my chem paper on friday..it was horrible..say bye bye to HD for chem ria..BYE (i hate Judy now more than ever)
anyways..had been staying over at taylors for like 4 consecutive days...wednesday, went city then echopoint...we sang too many screamo songs it hurts...but all in the fun of it and to celebrate sky's bday on thursday...
shopped at bondi and city on thursday...had a new hairdo, new shoes and new vest with hoodie...how awesome is tt?? vest with hoodie...
friday was school dance...but slept too late on thursday nite tt i couldn't wake up for my first class at 10...act i did but i was too busy with my hair...gi had to help me with it hahaha...then left chem in the middle of the lesson to look for pal to transfer some songs we wanted to hear at the dance...awesome, except tt judy became a bitch when me and cherie entered the class 30 min later...english was heaven, though i find the subj dumb but i hv a great teacher...shannon and sue noticed my hair and they liked it...everyone liked it except for annoying alam who always ask STUPID questions...feel like smacking his face...the school dance later tt night was superb..really enjoyed myself..was so pumped for clubbing after cherie's bday dinner at icecube but the guys backed out and i dun dare to bring 2 girls with me clubbing somewhere we've nvr been...so we decided to go to echopoint again...dragged T and Tubu along...we had fun but me and cherie were tired frm dance...came hm to a little drama...2nd interest went missing, T and first interest Max are pissed especially T..and i wouldn't blame her coz 2nd interest is a MOFO Bitch...and i won't take it back...she needs an intervention...she likes my gd fren but my gd fren dun like her...has the cheek to say 2 girls like her when its only 1, and she likes the fren...CB la she...can go rot...
after talking to them and showering, i wanted to slp, but 2 a**holes slpt at my place...so i just went out to common room and played 1 round of ps2 before packing up and talking to char in her room...made me promise tt nth spoken in there shld be released to others, i kept my word but she freaked out and blurted abt sth we talked abt...tt was the following day when we went out to watch Make It Happen (its a lousy movie..DUN WATCH..very predictable)...wrote a 3 sms long msg to her...we're still friends, no worries...
so tt night (sat) me Cher and sky had a really long talk in the tv room..not before sky bullied me while i was slping on cherie's bed...gi was on her bed laughing all the way..cherie just stood by the door laughing her ass off...it would hv been a great video moment..but too bad..the camera woman was under attack by a crazy dude...haha
everyone knows i'm bi now...except germ gi and nic i guess, and the guys except rohit and anson...a little relieved actually...no nd to hide..even max knows i'm bi...and how i'm joce's (biatch) "2nd person" plus how mad i am at her for being such a flirt who goes after a fren...within 1 wk she has shown her true colours and i thank God for it...anyways, let's backtrack a little to friday night after icecube..i was freezing...max came over to hug me to keep me warm (alr know i'm bi)...so did her sis...true SAC sisters...today, char treated us to buffet at shangri-la hotel..gd thing my stomach has expanded so much over the winter tt i could eat...i wore my black shirt and jeans with my white belt and new white shoes, plus my green scarf...yea i looked like a guy..but i dun care...purposely stood beside max coz she was the only one shorter than me even after putting on heels haha...the rest made me feel short..but i also had another motive for standing near her..yes cherie u might be thinking of tt too, yup i still like her though i said she was childish and could be my little sister, but then again maybe not..i dun wanna be a boob again the way i fell for joce...so i'll take things slow...even when sky has a feeling she likes me and she kinda slapped my face playfully during dinner when my face just made her laugh..

What in the....

Oh my LORD...i can't believe how emo i was in my last post...i find it funny after reading it haha
anyways...i totally freaked out for physics la...and my interest saw it all tt she stood beside me wishing me luck...dunno whether it was a "put ur hands ard me" moment or what la..but if u see me in distress pls stretch out ur arm and give the person a hug...damn...i didn't do tt yesterday when she was freaking out on maths haha...lousy, maybe coz her friends were there

and i'm not sure bout the deal with MS?? Mat Singapore?? seriously, his actual name sounds nicer...not to be mean but she said she dun like him...but then i hear frm my buddy u called him to ask him to save a seat for u in the library...if u wanna study, study with someone who has taken the subject or is taking the same subject as u...tt dude just came not tt long ago in extended and u hang out with him soo much...what am i to feel?? u playing me or u guys are just friends...it feels more like he's interested in you and if u truly dun like him STOP sending wrong signals...esp to me

ooh, plus Mr F's starting to flirt with me...i really dun wanna hv 2 players toying ard with me...i'll flare up and no one would wanna see tt...only a few ppl hv managed to cool me down...i'm tt scary trust me...gotta make a move

Shopping spree tmr and dance battle on friday...plus a stupid draft to complete by thursday...deep shit for tt draft but i dun freaking care

Distracted

rmb i told u guys i've become straight...guess what? i've moved over to the dark side again swinging both ways as kim would put it...and this is now an issue for me...

not tt i mind being gay but getting distracted by someone in the midst of exam fever is torturing for me...seriously..i've got no mood to study though my paper starts tmr...i just hv to let it all out before i commit myself to studying...

her face lit up my day when i was pissed at my groupmates' inefficiency to hv a meeting...not dividing the work till the last minute ie the wk before exams...she's pretty and mature, not like those auntie auntie type...one tt i can talk to and joke ard with..but does she feel the same way? or am i just a friend to her? are my words in the $7 worth of msg getting her interested in me? its too early to conclude...i am finding ways to be ard her more often, even if it is asking her out on a friends' bdae dinner...and creating an inpromptu picnic nxt sat to "celebrate" a fren's belated bdae cum soccer team gathering the following day which made her think abt staying over at taylors house on friday...i want us to happen but i will nvr force someone into a relationship...love hv to happen both ways..i mean both parties hv to love one another for a relationship to workout...and finding tt right person tt u can comunicate with is extremely impt...this i've just found out 2 wks after the taylors house sex talk...its not abt humor, it's abt communication, love, dependence (a shoulder to lean on), comfort and trust..

this is not another kimsim dilemma...tt was pure infatuation..this is diff...i know i sound real emo now but i hv been tt way for the past few wks...(and rohit detected tt sth was bothering me) can't explain it...i just can't explain it, she wasn't the first interest..but she's a friend of the first interest...but i did start liking the first interest when i first met her at the extended program's country grouping...was it a hidden love at first sight for me? can someone explain this welcoming situation to me??

its true when ppl say tt sometimes u can't find the words to describe the way u feel abt someone...each time sky asks me what i like abt her, is it bcoz u know she's bi, dun go for it if u dun love her or u would wind up breaking her heart...my mind goes blank and i'd be wandering, swimming in my thoughts of emotions searching for a noun but i can't find it...all i could come up with is "i dunno...(blushing and smiling to myself)"

i always chat with wan abt wat u find attractive abt someone at first sight...both of us agreed tt its the smile and eyes...she has a cute innocent smile..but beneath tt she has her wild side...though she still has her braces on, i can imagine how her smile would look like after removing the braces...could she be the one i waited 20 yrs for?? like i said, its still too early...i'll just hv to wait and see what would happen in the coming wk when loads of activities are occuring, tests, school dance, dinner and picnic...not to mention my shoppping spree on wed and clubbing on friday...it'll be a long wk ahead...(dun fall sick, ask God for guidance)

Browsing

i was reading through blogs...those frm taylors..no one tagged me so no one knows my blog..yeah
anyways guess what?? i'm gonna play soccer nxt wed in the soccer gala...haha amazing right..my body ached for like 3 days..its better now..haha
beijing opening ceremony was awesome...but the countdown for National Day was better...all of us were high on nth..haha, sang nat anthem, nat songs tt we knew plus recite the pledge...made Rman be Stamford Raffles and the Merlion haha...uploaded some of the videos on facebook for ppl to see...it was fun..i would nvr do this in singapore..haha oh did i mention there was a cake? really damn patriotic man...
didn't hv a gd rest, went to bed at 5am after my ps2 match with tubu and someone had to open the tv room door at 7am in the morning...i was like oshit, so i went to the toilet and slept in the shower room for a while...then back to tv room, the same person open the door...so i decided to switch on the tv to indicate there's someone in the room watching the tv...had peace after tt...
after showering i was too tired to follow gi and cherie to the flea market at surry hills, thnk god i didn't go coz it was closed...so me, T, Max and germ just hung out in gi and cherie's room coz we were too lazy to move...nicole and char joined us later...we just talked and talked and talked till its time to get ready for dinner...me and char tried to convince someone not to come, almost succeeded but tt person decided to tag along in the end..damn...
dinner at night @ Harrys Singapore Chilli Crab was awesome...the crab and calamari tt is...the crabs are HUGE...and char's grandfather treated us dinner which was real sweet of him....i think 15 of us would hv to fork out $50 each if tt didn't happen..so i was really grateful, its a blessing...
the weekend was awesome...including church...i totally forgot abt the new album tt was out in july haha...gonna buy the CD+DVD nxt mth when i hv money...and new shoes and a vest...
plus talking to ppl i usually dun hv time to talk to, really opened my eyes to what's gg on...my conversations are usually private, i won't disclose anything ppl say abt u unless its positive...tt's just me...maintaining neutral views of everything...i'll be the final judge of what i think of a person...i'll investigate a person's behavior first hand and judge their character...from there u'll know how to attempt to talk to a person without offending them much and getting personal with the other party, thus solving the dilemma u hv and turn it into sth positive...i'm sure i dun look like the type coz of the way i dress and behave right..but yea, only ppl who really know me knows it...i'll credit some of them; Deb & WanYing...be honored ok...haha

PS: sometimes i wonder why i'm studying science...